Urgh

[arabwel]

So, recap of today. I habve a sinus infection, a sore tooth, pink eye, possibly angina or whatever that is in English, and on top of that, they cut off my phone due to unpaid bills.

Oops.

and that's not all. the fucking doc I saw today about keeping the money sflowing? Dear God she made me want to scream. she actually ahd the gall to suggest Id'd go to the effing ward. I felt more cornered and fucking ready to bolt or tear something apart than I have in ages - dear God but I wnated to scream. their ethical duty to see me get better and not be sent to early retirement - yeah rigght. 'shudders*

she was not pleased to heart hat i am off to Briutland, but I am secure for another six months. ther eis going to be a meeting, to which I was cordially invited *snort, involving a lot of people.. the people who give me my disability, the social services,t he nice people who pay the jobless, the doc at the health center... that sort of a thing. I am SO not looking forward to it.

the gist of it? they are forcing me to try to "get better" aka go to school or somesuch. can we say no. fucking. way!

amusingly enough, the one thing she kept harping on about is my sleep schedule - which is, as I like to say, perfectly n9ormal for someone whose "Job" is writing, with people who live on another continent. Bleh.

I am going to write morre pr0n now, I think. And still hoping for someone to give the Lordi/Awa/Dima thing a look about if it works or not before I post.

Comments

[ariskari.livejournal.com]

Sinus infection is of the suck. And I seriously hope you don't have angina (unless it means something different and less scary in Finnish, and they I still hope you don't have it because other medical problems suck too) because that is even more Not Good.

[arabwel.livejournal.com]

Apparently, I meant tonsilitis. the colloqual name for that is "Angiina" in FInnish for some obscure reason and I was too tired to check it before I toddled off to bed. but yeah, not fin - everything hurts.

Plus, on top of everything else? MY period just started. *facepalms*

[ariskari.livejournal.com]

Oh good. Tonsilitis probably still isn't fun, but angina is chest pains and can be a precursor to a heart attack. So I'm glad you don't have that ^.^

[arabwel.livejournal.com]

Yeah, so i have gathered. guess should edit a little. I donöt think i am uyet about to have a heart attack.. the last few times they took an EKG of me it was all smooth sialing, even if my maternal until has a totally weird-o heart.probs...

*hugs*

[ariskari.livejournal.com]

Tis all (apart from the other health problems) good them. I do hope you feel better soon.

[arabwel.livejournal.com]

I hope so too - I will know about the tonsilitis tomorrow and if that is indeed the case, i have to toddle down there to get another 'script for meds...

... poor social eservices. they'ce pad my medical expenses for... *thinks' well, if I count my glasses? Around 800 euros at the very least. cause they alone were 638.-... meds, I have been hoisting on them by the effing bucketful - antibiotics, antridepressants, painkillers, migrraine meds, contraception, cough syrup.-... poor guys,r elaly.

[navigatorsghost.livejournal.com]

*snuggles!*

Can look at that thing for you if you want - email it to me?

[arabwel.livejournal.com]

*snugglgeclings and is happy that e-hugs do not in*

You are locvely, you know that? Shall be sending it to you,then :)

[rifumi.livejournal.com]

Well, I was just wondering. Is your therapist qualified, at all? Or is she just some communal psychologist who is winging therapy at the side? If latter is the case, as I suspect it is, I urge you to find a real, qualified therapist. For that you would probably have to move to a bigger city, though. Which would only help, I am sure, since the town you live in sounds like a real shithole, if you pardon my language. As long as you are under 26, you can get a good therapist to see you with minimal cost, courtesy of Kela.

[arabwel.livejournal.com]

My so-called therapist? she's a "psykiatrinen erikoissairaanhoitaja", that's what all of them have been. when I brought up the thing about "I want a good therapist for psychotherapy, not supportive therapy!" they were all sorts of "maybe when you do what we wnat you to do", the bitches. the doctor is pretty much the Power that Is in the whole shebang in the Oulun lääni, so she is a2ualified... but knows jack about me asince I see her maybe twice a year.

Mostly the problem for moving to anotherm bigger place is the lack of money - not being able to get into the sopcial services' goodgraces immediatel. if they can solve that, I am SO the HELL outta here.

[cutedeadgirl.livejournal.com]

Have you looked into finding a private psychiatrist? Kela can pay for most of it so I pay 35€/hour for mine about once a moth or less often. And yeah Kela still pays for that even they refuse to for the moment acknowledge I am disabled.

If you find the right person she/he *will* listen to you, and work with and for you against the evil gov. I don't know what I'd do without mine. Ask around, that might be a huge help for you.

[arabwel.livejournal.com]

Not a single psychiatrist otr such in my lovely hometown - Pudasjärvi is a wretched hive of scum and reindeer-fuckers *sigh* I won't be able to get therapy of the good sort until/if I get the hell out of here :/

[cutedeadgirl.livejournal.com]

You need to move over here :). Capital area has everything, altho it depends greatly on where exactly you settle in.

[arabwel.livejournal.com]

I donöt deal well with people *sigh* so I would be like a fish out of water anywhere larger tham, sya, Oulu or rovaniemi. I find Helsinki to be extremely intimidating.

[cutedeadgirl.livejournal.com]

I use this thing called "not going out" ;).

[arabwel.livejournal.com]

THey want me to_ *sigh* Plus, there's such thing as grocery shoppin and so on.

[rifumi.livejournal.com]

Nahh, they're bullshitting you. First, once you get approved by Kela, YOU get to choose the therapist, not anyone else. Second, I doubt there are any qualified therapists near where you live, Oulu might be the best bet. So tell them that as long as you are getting "therapy" from an underqualified communal psychologist, they can't expect your condition to improve. You might also want to consider lying your way out - pick a school or a workplace in Oulu or whereever where you "really, really" want to attend, and maybe they'll take care of it for you. Sometimes you need to be a bitch to get what you need.

[cutedeadgirl.livejournal.com]

Gawd don't you just hate Kela and other gov agencies? I have been without money since early this year, because I am 2not disabled enough" thanks to the one stupid asshole who I bet didn't even read all the info (info they got cause they sent me to extensive testing they paid for that took some months few times a week). Never mind that I can just about walk once more now not to mention all the other shit.

I swear these people will do anything to keep disabled people getting anything. I hope they will all get really sick later in their lives and be denied assistance. Horrible thing to wish on someone else, but they should get the taste of what it's like since they are governing over our lives with no seeming conscience.

*hugs* I'd like to say it will work out, but with them all... it's pretty 50/50.

[arabwel.livejournal.com]

they are assholes, yeah - I've seen it with myt mom, eho only recently was granted disability - after years of crippling pain.

I am hoping these idots can do SOEMTHING; like. oh, i donöt know. mayube I can make them help me get the hell out of this idiotic little town...

*hugs*